Crazy Dreams

Dreaming of Buddy Rich & Eggs

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I somehow was notified that I was requested to be a Buddy Rich’s* funeral. They needed a flag bearer, and they wanted not only a drummer, but somebody who was “religious.” My job was to stand on the side of the church/hall/synagogue (whatever it was), and hold the flag for the brotherhood of drummers. (There is no official brotherhood of drummers, and there really is no official flag, but apparently in this dream there was.)

I stood on the side. Nancy Pelosi stood behind me. It’d been a long time since I’d been a Boy Scout, so my flag etiquette was a little rusty. The American Flag led the procession. When it passed, I dipped the flag of the Brotherhood of Drummers. Next came the officiant. Next was Buddy’s coffin. As it passed, Nancy poked me and told me to dip the drummer flag in honor of Buddy. I didn’t think I was supposed to, but I did in difference to her.

After the procession was over, Nancy pulled me aside. She said “Why didn’t you make that sign of the cross thing, you know, like priests do? ” I said “Well, I’m not a priest. In fact, I’m not even Catholic! And, since Buddy was Jewish, I don’t think the arch diocese will mind that I didn’t make the sign of the cross.” And she said:

“The arch diocese is Catholic?”

Then I woke up. But then there was more! I fell back asleep, and was rewarded with this little number.

I was walking from my grandmother’s house to my mother’s house (they are next door to each other in real life). I was carrying three flats of eggs. These eggs had been in my grandmother’s fridge for many weeks, and no one was eating them.** I was taking them over to my mother’s house to eat them.

While crossing the lawn, I met Ron (one of my employees) and his wife Heather. Ron said “You’re not going to eat those eggs, are you?” I responded “I think they’ll be ok.” Then I said “Heather, you’re a farm girl; are these eggs ok?” (In real life, Heather’s family owns a farm.)

I pulled the top off the eggs. Each egg was in a little crocheted pouch. One was cracked. “That’s probably not one we should judge,” I said. “Let’s crack one open right here. You can look at it and smell it, and tell me if it’s ok.” Heather said she’d really rather not smell what might be a rotten egg.

The end.

*Buddy Rich was discussed at the office the last two days.
**We also have some eggs at the office. A customer brought them by for us. No one has touched them. They’ve been there for some time.

More Devil Dreams

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It’s not the first time I’ve dreamed of the Devil. Heck, it’s only been a few weeks since my last one! I don’t remember all the details. Susan and I were moving (or helping someone move) out of a very old mansion. The house was possessed by, you guessed it, Satan.  My job was to keep him at bay until we could move out. I remember I had two very old pulpit Bibles I carried around with me everywhere. Satan wanted them for some particular reason. I remember a scene in the courtyard where the Devil was giving a “pep talk” to some of the locals. As he was talking, he was slowly turning from a human form into his more natural “devil” look. And, I remember having him trapped at one point in a room. He turned into a frog and escaped down a hole used for a heating pipe. I went one floor below, and found a Haitian looking woman packing. I asked who she was, and she replied she was a servant helping us pack. I said “Or perhaps you’re the devil in human form!” She said she wasn’t, but that she had noticed the smell of brimstone in the room a few moments before. I went into the next room, and found the Devil over there.  That’s all I remember.

The Macquarium

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For those of you who haven’t checked out the other parts of my site, you might not know that I’ve built a bunch of Macquariums. Most I’ve either given away or sold, but I’ve kept one in the office for many years. My kids have been asking me to build another one, so they can have one here at home. The fish at work died a couple of weeks ago. Today, I decided I’d bring the Macquarium home the office, and set it up at home. (The kids are at camp; I was hoping to surprise them when they got home.) I was washing the tank in the sink, getting it nice and clean, when I spied a small crack in the side. It was not there when it was at the office. Then SNAP, the crack got huge, and water began pouring out. I broke the tank. I have the glass downstairs to build another tank, but not the aquarium sealant. And, it takes a total of three days to build a tank–not enough time before the kids get home. Shucks!

Dreaming of the Devil

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In the dream, I was going to visit this Catholic priest I knew: one Father Priori. Yup. The priest in my dream had a name. I walked up to his house, and knocked on his door. The door opened, and there was the priest, but it wasn’t quite him. It looked sorta like him, but he was all pasty white, like he’d been covered in hand cream and flour, or something. He was couched down, and hunched over, and looking up at me, and snarling. That’s when I realized the devil had possessed Father Priori! It caused me to throw up in my mouth. And what did I throw up? You guessed it: a turd! How my digestive system got so messed up is beyond me, but I ended up with this smallish, and very firm, poop in my mouth. And what did I do with this little fecal thingy? What would you do? I threw it at the devil! Then I woke up.

Judge Not!

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Today, the Governor of Maine signed a bill that changes Maine law to read that marriage is between two persons, not just a man and a woman. It’s certainly a hot button issue, and not really one that I want to get into with this post. In the discussions I’ve seen online and had with people, I’ve run into the “Judge not, lest you be judged” argument. Specifically, that’s what I’d like to talk about.

First, let’s look a the passage of scripture specifically. It comes from Matthew 7. This is Jesus speaking.

“Do not judge, or you too will be judged.”

Seems simple enough. The problem is, no one goes any further. They stop there. Let’s go on to verse 2.

“For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

Here’s how I read that. “Be careful how you judge someone, because that very same yardstick you use on someone else will also be used by you.”

Jesus continues in verse three:

3“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. (Italics mine.)

Jesus isn’t telling us to not judge at all. If he were, he would of said something like “Don’t worry about the speck in your brother’s eye, for you have no right to judge him anyway.” No, instead he warns us again to make sure we ourselves have our own house in order before we go about passing judgment. It’s not right for us to condemn something if we ourselves are doing the very same thing! So before we judge someone’s actions, we’d better be sure we’re not guilty of the very same thing upon which we’re about to pass judgment. (See also Romans 2.)

And besides, whose judgment are we passing, anyways? Are we allowed to say murder is wrong? If we’re not supposed to judge, then who are we to say murder is wrong? Here’s the good part: we don’t have to say it. God did. God’s word already tells us murder is wrong. We’re not passing judgment, really, as much as we’re agreeing with the standard already set up by God himself. He’s already judged murder as wrong. We’re merely agreeing with him.

Someone on Facebook posted this one: “You, then, why do you judge your brother? Or why do you look down on your brother?” That’s from Romans 14. And it’s taken WAY out of context. Look at the passage. The passage is concerning 1) believers, and 2) “disputable matters.” The Apostle Paul is talking to two different sets of believers: one set doesn’t eat meat, another group does. What Paul is saying is “Don’t get worked up over something that isn’t a big deal. Decide for yourself if a ‘questionable matter’ is right or wrong. Then stick with that. And if another Christian doesn’t subscribe to that teaching, so be it. Don’t get bent out of shape about it. Love your fellow Christian just the same.”

People are not going to agree about this topic. I understand that. My hope today is that people will become a little more informed, and not just throw out the “Don’t judge” argument. It’s not really valid.