You Know It’s January In Maine
#10: You know it’s January in Maine when not one, but MULTIPLE friends tell you excitedly “We’ve gained 19 minutes of daylight!”
You know it’s January in Maine, #9. The furnace won’t start up. The car won’t start up. The generator won’t start up. The only thing that DID start up was your seasonal affective disorder.
You know it’s January in Maine #8: When the crink in your back is inversely proportional to the angle of your shovel handle.
You know it’s January in ME #7. Wind pants. Sweatshirt. Boots. Two pairs of socks. Hat. Mittens. Headlamp. Reflective vest. Reflective collar. You know it’s January in Maine when it takes longer to gear up for the dog walk than actually taking them out! And then, when you are ready, they don’t want to go outside!
You know it’s January in Maine #6: When you leave for work and it’s dark; you come from work and it’s dark. Sunshine is something you get to see on Saturday–if there’s not a blizzard that particular Saturday.
You know it’s January in Maine #5: when your crock-pot is permanently plugged in. There are times when you are running two crock-pots at the same time.
You know it’s January in Maine #4: When you spend your Saturday in a shack, on the ice, with no toilet, heat generated by something about the size of your thermos, all so you can maybe catch a fish that’s too small to eat anyway.
You know it’s January in Maine #3: When you notice the shower handle in the bathroom is turned all the way to the left, and still you can’t get warm.
You know it’s January in Maine #2: You have to wait in line at the gas station in Oxford. The line is made up entirely of snowmobiles.
Finally, you know it’s January in Maine #1: You can drive down Main Street in Camden, Rockland, Wiscasset, or Bar Harbor and not run over a single tourist!